Quote of the Day: Ann Landers

"If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife."

~ Ann Landers

Stanwyck & MacMurray

Gents, this is a painful truth that cuts both ways.

My bride and I just watched "Double Indemnity" yesterday, a great movie that you might consider the "Fatal Attraction" of the 1940's, a film that keeps you on the marriage straight-and-narrow. In the movie, Fred MacMurray of "My Three Sons" fame plays an outstanding dirt bag, much like Andy Griffith did in "A Face in the Crowd." MacMurray is an insurance salesman who's a little too cool for his own good, and when he crosses paths with a spurned and bored wife, an outstanding Barbara Stanwyck, the two cook up a plan to off the husband and recoup the insurance payout. The only problem? Your sin will find you out (Numbers 32:23), in this film in the guise of a cigar-chomping ("Where are my matches?") Edward G. Robinson.

What do we learn from such quotes and such movies. The grass is NOT greener--it's NEVER greener on the other side of the fence. Husband, if your eyes wander from your bride now to someone who catches your eye and you trash your bride for the sake of a newer model, how long will it be before your eye begins to stray again (really, the heart of Ms. Landers' quote)?

Join me now in taking Job's pledge and make a covenant with your eyes that you will not let your eyes stray (Job 31:1). Satan desires nothing more than to see your marriage lying in ruins and your life devastated. With the power that God provides you, rebuke yourself and take your eyes and flee from those situations that cause you issue. When you hear those whispers that someone else will understand you better than your bride, identify them as the lies that they are (Proverbs 5:3-4, 7:21), and run away.

(**SPOILER ALERT**) I love the old movies because good and evil is clearly portrayed for what they are. Knowing that the wages of sin is death, it comes as no surprise to find MacMurray and Stanwyck dead at the end of the movie at the hands of the other. States may strike down laws that once made adultery illegal, but they cannot change the truth of God's word or the response of man's conscience to that truth.

Husband, love your wife by keeping your eyes upon her and by keeping your eyes upon Christ.

Stare away!

When's the last time you really stared at your wife? Not a passing glance, but a drink-in-the-vista beholding as though you were perched upon the rim of the Grand Canyon during a sunset that even HD would't do justice.

Look at her.

Do you remember the day you stood at the end of a long aisle and first beheld your bride, painstakingly bedecked that she might present herself to you in all her radiance? That image is etched into my memory like no other.  A close second would be the look on my sons' faces as their eyes first caught sight of their woman at the end of the aisle.

We have enough trouble with our eyes. Lots of women don't get it. Many are trying (thank you, ladies).  Many finally understand (thank you, ladies). Job wouldn't have been making covenants four milennia ago (Job 31:1) nor would our Savior have been suggesting hyperbolic eye-plucking two milennia ago (Matthew 5:27-30) if this weren't an issue for the ages.

Yes, God made women exquisitely beautiful, but women are not yours. There is but one woman who is wholly and solely yours. Solomon told his sons to drink water from their own well (Proverbs 5:15) and to be always intoxicated by the love of their wife (5:19). A great way to appreciate the treasure that God has given you in this woman is to stare at her. No, not like you would stare at the young man whose face got caught in a jean-studder. And no, not like a coroner performing an autopsy. Stare like a connisseur drinking in the Sistine Chapel. Like a child who sees all the presents under the tree.  Like a city-dweller who spies the Grand Tetons for the very first time.

Not only will such wonder kindle a deep appreciation to God for your bride in your heart, but it will affirm and build the woman you love. In an era where marriages are crumbling faster than the economy, little will build a bride's security more than knowing she has the eye of her man. One woman confessed,

I will admit that there have been times when my husband has commented on something about another woman that left me wondering if he ever noticed those things about me anymore or if he found that "thing" more attractive than the corresponding part on me.  Women compare themselves to others so frequently.  I think that comes from all that the world barrages us with and the normal self esteem issues that most women have, but when a man notices something about another woman, or his wife notices him watching another woman, it does raise questions in her mind about whether or not she is good enough.  Sad, but true.

Gents, we must guard our eyes.  There's one extraordinary person God has given us upon which we can train our eyes.  Read the Song of Solomon 4. That was a man who stared at his woman.

Next time you get a chance, brother, stare at your wife because you can!
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(Bonus points to any that can identify the eyes at the top of the post)