A modest proposal

On Facebook recently, I have posted a number of links encouraging women toward modesty. Why? God gave me two eyes and they both work (despite living my life in tri-focals). Check out this link from CNN and this video from YouTube if you haven't seen them yet. Even if you have, check 'em out again.

With those in mind, a couple points.

1.  Man struggles with his eyes. No Holmesian deduction required. 90% of men struggle with their eyes; the other ten percent struggle with lying. If this were not true, dentists wouldn't use bikini-clad lasses in hammocks on tropical beaches to sell dentistry. If this were not true, Job would not have made a covenant with his eyes (Job 31:1-4). If this were not true, Jesus would not have mentioned lust (Matthew 5:27-30). If this were not true, Bathsheba would not have caused David an issue and Solomon would not have had to encourage his sons to focus upon the endowments of their wife alone (Proverbs 5:15, 19).

2.  The attire of today's woman exploits this in man.  Duh.  Requires less explanation than the last one.

Let's run with this for a moment. Young women who still live at home dress this way with the knowledge and blessing of their father. Where are the dads? What father would let his daughter walk out of the house dressed in a manner that will allure young men like a bleeding seal in shark infested waters? Where are the dads teaching her to preserve her purity for her husband? Where are the dads teaching their daughters not to defraud (falsely entice) their brothers in Christ young and old (1 Thessalonians 4:3-8)?

Which begs the question, where are the moms? Look around the average church in America and you see that they are dressed just like their daughters. Husbands, this is where you come in. Do you want other men tempted by your wife in thought and deed? You might like it when your woman dresses "hot," but don't you realize that other men are circling the boat?

A few years ago my wife and I went to dinner and a Christian couple we knew sat at the table next to us. They were by themselves and it was--um--obvious that she had dressed to please her husband's eye. Thankfully, my back was to their table, but I had to think of the poor waiter who had to look down at her to take her order. That's NOT looking out for others.  Because I can do something does not mean I should do something.

Gents, lead your wife in love by leading her in modesty.  Let her dress "hot" for you--in the bedroom. If she tries something on that makes you swallow hard, it's likely going to make other men swallow hard, too. I'm not here to advocate measuring hemlines or necklines, but to encourage that we, in love, consider what affect our conduct--in this case, our dress--has on others. 

Can a woman dress beautifully and not dress sexually? Beautiful feminine dress is by definition sexual; it makes a woman look like a woman. It can be beautiful, feminine but does not have to be provocative. Let's teach our wives and daughters to provoke only their husbands in a place of provocation by guiding and encouraging them in fashion that does not cause their brothers in Christ and all men who are created in the image of God to struggle with misplaced desire. They can dress in beauty and in modesty. It might be contrary to the current fashion of the t-shirt that looks like it was spray-painted to the skin and the trousers that stop just north of the Mason-Dixon Line, but better to buck fashion than to bruise our brothers.

How will they know unless they are told? It's time we speak up in love.  Please? I'll be paying you that same courtesy.